A Date From Hell

“Damn, I should have ordered this fillet instead!!” She mumbles as she stuffs the 7th, 8th…too many mouthfuls from his plate.

“Go ahead, dear,” He says as he clears his throat to mask his discomfort.
“These tacos are so pricey, yet so far from delicious.” She whines.

He nods his head mechanically, clueless what to say about that!
Just as about he thought the date could not take another left turn, there she goes signalling the waiter by snapping her fingers.

As she fidgets, his attention is grabbed by her cleavage that’s threatening to burst the linen that is tenderly holding the puppies together.
This glorious moment is rudely interrupted by her voice saying, “Why did you bring me such pathetic food?!”

You are shocked because a few seconds ago, she was savouring it.

“What’s wrong with it maam?” The waiter kindly asks.
“First of all, I am not your mother,” She says bluntly.
“About the food, don’t get me started!”

The contempt painted on her face could have made you throw up. “Just pack it well, I will take it to my dogs.” She adds.

“Bring me whatever he is having, and the Little-Paris Sidebar cocktail to wash the bad taste in my mouth.” She orders.

“You mean the Ritz-Paris-Sidecar?” The waiter asks.
“Yes that one, she responds with her cheeks flushed with embarrassment.”

“Where were we?” She asks as the waiter hurriedly goes to get the order.
“Ühhmmm, Uhhhmmmm…” he’s lost of words because something is worrying him.

He had asked her out for just a coffee at this posh restaurant to impress her. It turns out that she has ordered a ‘7-course meal.’

She started by saying she isn’t a coffee person, so opted for some salad and some lemonade.
A few bites into the green raw stuff, she says she should have ordered something better because she’s starving. So she asks him, “what will you eat?”

“I will just take coffee,” he responds.
“C’mon, the food here is sumptuous,” let me recommend something for you.

Reluctantly, he agrees as she quickly tells the waiter, that she’ll have some tacos.
Up to this point, you know the tacos went to the dogs literally, and in comes the fillet, and the cocktail she could barely pronounce.

She is merrily chatting as she devours her portion like a savage. The boy only manages a few grins a couple of adjectives in the conversation.

When the moment of reckoning arrives, he is smart enough to wait a few minutes before checking the bill.

The sight of the digits written of the piece of sheet sends the sugary fluid he is sipping down the wrong pipe.

He lets out a cough that sends him scrambling to the washrooms.
He stares at is watery eyes menacingly on the mirror as he washes his hands and asks himself.

“What the hell did you get yourself into?!! That bill is more than half your college tuition fee!!”
He pauses for a moment as if he was waiting for the man in the mirror to respond.

Suddenly his eyes light up, as his heart starts to pound.
He turns and casually walks; out of the washroom, past the busy waiters, then towards the door as he hopes she doesn’t spot him, and finally steps out of the restaurant…

He has not been picking her calls or any other unfamiliar calls since then…